Hello Beautiful Momma,
Now I know as moms, we want to do everything that we can to make sure that our children have the best foundation for development and that they learn the skills that they need to be successful in life as they grow and mature.
It’s funny how we will make sure they have stylish clothes, the latest gadgets, and splurge on vacations to Disney, but we never think about how we treat our selves and how that sets the foundation for how our children will treat themselves.
The way you treat yourself sets the foundation for how your child should treat themselves
Let’s face it Momma, you know that our children look up to us more than anyone else. The mother is The Blueprint- for her son she is the blueprint for the kind of woman that he should marry, and for her daughter the mother is a role model of the kind of woman that she should grow up to be.
Think about it…How are you treating yourself? How are you talking to yourself? If your children hear you berating yourself and judging yourself harshly, they will learn that is how they should talk to and treat themselves.
Are you taking care of yourself physically? How about the food that you’re eating? This also sets a pattern for how our children will think that they should care for themselves now and in the future.
The truth of the matter is that the old “oxygen mask” metaphor holds true in this case as well (It’s a cliché for a reason). You simply cannot take the best care of anyone else until you first take care of yourself.
So what does this look like for you Momma?
I know that when life is busy and there are a million things going on, the last thing that you want to think about is how to take care of yourself (who has time for that?) however, you must make time. It is not selfish to take good care of yourself. It is actually essential. It’s essential for your health and to keep you around as long as possible to live a long life, as well as be in the best shape that you can be in, to achieve all of the dreams and visions that are in your heart (yes, even that dream you’ve tucked away since becoming a mother). You also want to be here for your children, grandchildren, and even great grandchildren in the future to show them the way and the foundation for success.
How can you start to take care of yourself today? Here’s what you can to do to get started.
List three things that you enjoy doing. For me it’s taking a walk, reading for pleasure, and taking time to hang out with my girlfriends. When I make space for these things in my life I feel better. This makes me less prone to mood swings, stress, anxiety and I’m better prepared to deal with the everyday challenges of life that come up. Often we lose our selves in the role of mother, spouse/partner, friend, family member, that we often lose ourselves in that process.
Also, consider your spiritual development. This doesn’t have to be necessarily religious, but do you take time to journal, meditate, or pray? Even just incorporating one of these practices as a daily habit will go a long way towards relieving every day anxieties and frustration.
Believe me when I tell you that working on me was the best thing step that I have ever taken towards becoming a better mom. It’s never too late. You can start today. You will be glad you did. And your children will thank you as well.
Until next time, be blessed Momma!
Toya the FNP
“Train up a child in the way they should go,
and when they are old they will not depart from it”